Sometimes, we feel too firmly grounded; pulled by the Earth's immense gravity, weighed down by thousands of meter of air above us, enclosed in some concrete flat rooted to the ground. You can jump no more than a few feet however hard you try, and you certainly couldnt fly. You can hardly get more depressed than staring at your earthbound feet.
Yet we forget the fact that the earth is just a free floating globe, traipsing its way around the sun in endless space. From above, we are on a glowing blue and green sphere, encircling a glittering star at a speed that would have our hair streaming past our face if it had been on a highway. And indeed, it is some sort of a highway that our vehicle, the earth, is on: the Milkyway.
Along with the earth, the sun encircle some unknown center of the galaxy, itself but a spark alongside the myriads of stars glowing beautifully on their journey spiralling towards the center of the galaxy.
This galaxy, from afar, is yet another point of light, like a star, flying beside the many thousands of galaxies, each outdoing the other in their brilliance; breathtaking patterns in the skies forming an immense picture of light.
And we are flying, amongst the stars -- the giants of light.
Saturday, October 21, 2006
Friday, October 13, 2006
Understanding
We all like our friends to understand us; even more so, we like the one we love to understand us, perfectly, if possible. While probably not realizable in reality, since the only person who can understand you perfectly is probably only a photo-copied you, nonetheless it isn't unreasonable to hope for a person like that would eventually come along.
What isnt immediately obvious is that there is not just 1 kind of understanding, but in fact, at least 3 kinds of understanding. Particularly for the case of the one you love, you probably want just 1 kind of understanding, namely the last which I shall talk about. However, different people have different preferences, so it may be that your view might differ significantly from mine, or that what you like may instead be a mix of the 3 kinds of understandings too. Regardless, lets look at what kind of understandings there are.
Firstly, there is the Smart-understanding. This particular person in your group of friends is able to anticipate what you like, what you don't like, what you are going to say, purely from your body language and inferences from your past behavior. In fact, he does it so well that he seems to be you voicing your own opinions, just that you are hearing it from him.
Perhaps he isnt really trying, not like he is a stalker or something, or mind reader. It just is obvious to him what you are going to do, say etc. As well all other people he met: he just knows what they going to do. But he likes to anticipate your actions and words just because he likes you. Nothing particularly wrong with that: even smart people are entitled to love.
Second type: Familiarity-understanding. I am going to avoid calling this Stalker-understanding, cos it is not. Familiarity breeds understanding: long term exposure to anyone can eventually give you a pretty good understanding of him in terms of his thinking, habits, etc.
Third type: SameFrequency-understanding. It isnt really that rare, to come across someone who thinks in roughly the same way as you. Sometimes you have friends who have the same habits, or same likes/dislikes. Quite reasonable, therefore to expect someone who is really on the same wavelength as you. There isnt any thinking, or long term exposure to you: he/she just happened to voice the same opinions as you, want to do the same thing, laugh at the same jokes, finds something hilarious while no one else except you does.
Well of course, we arent talking about exactly the same likes and dislikes, habits etc. Quite impossible in fact, unless you are gay or lesbians, since male and females already have different biological habits. But the really fun stuff, the ones you really place a lot of importance in, are where you hope you have this appropriate amount of same wavelengthness.
Unlike me, some people may prefer a combination of type 2 and type 3 understanding; taking pains to understand someone else through long term exposure can be a form of love, a sign of commitment to the relationship. In fact, most arranged marriages started off from purely type 2, and worked out fine in the end. Personally, however, since I am a pretty lazy person, and quite a romantic at heart, I much prefer someone who has so coincidentally the same frequency as me, laugh and talk about the same stuff all without trying to.
What isnt immediately obvious is that there is not just 1 kind of understanding, but in fact, at least 3 kinds of understanding. Particularly for the case of the one you love, you probably want just 1 kind of understanding, namely the last which I shall talk about. However, different people have different preferences, so it may be that your view might differ significantly from mine, or that what you like may instead be a mix of the 3 kinds of understandings too. Regardless, lets look at what kind of understandings there are.
Firstly, there is the Smart-understanding. This particular person in your group of friends is able to anticipate what you like, what you don't like, what you are going to say, purely from your body language and inferences from your past behavior. In fact, he does it so well that he seems to be you voicing your own opinions, just that you are hearing it from him.
Perhaps he isnt really trying, not like he is a stalker or something, or mind reader. It just is obvious to him what you are going to do, say etc. As well all other people he met: he just knows what they going to do. But he likes to anticipate your actions and words just because he likes you. Nothing particularly wrong with that: even smart people are entitled to love.
Second type: Familiarity-understanding. I am going to avoid calling this Stalker-understanding, cos it is not. Familiarity breeds understanding: long term exposure to anyone can eventually give you a pretty good understanding of him in terms of his thinking, habits, etc.
Third type: SameFrequency-understanding. It isnt really that rare, to come across someone who thinks in roughly the same way as you. Sometimes you have friends who have the same habits, or same likes/dislikes. Quite reasonable, therefore to expect someone who is really on the same wavelength as you. There isnt any thinking, or long term exposure to you: he/she just happened to voice the same opinions as you, want to do the same thing, laugh at the same jokes, finds something hilarious while no one else except you does.
Well of course, we arent talking about exactly the same likes and dislikes, habits etc. Quite impossible in fact, unless you are gay or lesbians, since male and females already have different biological habits. But the really fun stuff, the ones you really place a lot of importance in, are where you hope you have this appropriate amount of same wavelengthness.
Unlike me, some people may prefer a combination of type 2 and type 3 understanding; taking pains to understand someone else through long term exposure can be a form of love, a sign of commitment to the relationship. In fact, most arranged marriages started off from purely type 2, and worked out fine in the end. Personally, however, since I am a pretty lazy person, and quite a romantic at heart, I much prefer someone who has so coincidentally the same frequency as me, laugh and talk about the same stuff all without trying to.
Tuesday, October 03, 2006
damn creative
I ripped these from Serene's blog, when she explicitly said I couldn't do so. But hey, its funny. So sorry about that. heh.
Thursday, September 21, 2006
Tired
So tired... of everyday.
Tired of having to wake up,
of breathing,
of drinking water,
of having to bathe,
of having to decide on breakfast,
of actually eating the breakfast,
of trudging to school,
of deciding on where to lunch,
what to lunch,
and of lunching itself.
Tired of having to trudge home again,
of eating dinner,
of having to bathe again,
of reading notes,
of eating supper,
of being online,
of deciding when to sleep,
of trying to put myself to sleep,
of sleeping itself,
of breathing while sleeping.
Tired of having to wake up,
of breathing,
of drinking water,
of having to bathe,
of having to decide on breakfast,
of actually eating the breakfast,
of trudging to school,
of deciding on where to lunch,
what to lunch,
and of lunching itself.
Tired of having to trudge home again,
of eating dinner,
of having to bathe again,
of reading notes,
of eating supper,
of being online,
of deciding when to sleep,
of trying to put myself to sleep,
of sleeping itself,
of breathing while sleeping.
Tuesday, September 19, 2006
Hell
Living is a chore: the intense light hurts the eye; the incessant noise seiges the ear; the unending pain on the senses; the bland taste of food; the gnaw of hunger; the chore of inflating lungs; the thirst for water; the aimlessness of every day; the pointlessnesss of goals, ambitions; the fear of love; the worry about death; the hatred of sleep; the impossibility of staying clean; the inability to focus; the hunger for stimulations; the intense need for peace; the worry of heat; the terror of being cold.
What the...
What the...
Saturday, September 16, 2006
Inextricable
Poor, poor, pathetic fools
mired in that Cycle,
beyond their comprehension
lulled by the promise of Warmth and Comfort
exchanged warmth and comfort in it's stead;
fools' gold for fools' gold.
Moan for them;
dead as they were,
the stillborns
entrapped in a snare;
offering their souls on the Altar
initiates of Deception, and
Victim
to the seductive goddess
on a Pedestal.
mired in that Cycle,
beyond their comprehension
lulled by the promise of Warmth and Comfort
exchanged warmth and comfort in it's stead;
fools' gold for fools' gold.
Moan for them;
dead as they were,
the stillborns
entrapped in a snare;
offering their souls on the Altar
initiates of Deception, and
Victim
to the seductive goddess
on a Pedestal.
Thursday, September 07, 2006
Stupor
We are in a stupor.
The greater part of the day is spent in a daze: we know not what we are doing. Looking back at the end of the day, we can only remember some of the more interesting bits. Looking inward to yourself, what exactly are you feeling now? Happiness? Or some sadness carried over from a previous episode? Or would most of us say, for most of the time, we dont really know what we are feeling at all?
That's why we are constantly searching for interesting bits of news, things to do, anything to wake us up from this stupor, if only momentarily.
That is also the reason why you are reading this at all: to see if there is anything interesting written here, something to pull your attention outwards forcefully, as though to remind yourself that you are alive.
And you cant help but admit, that you feel yourself intrigued by this idea that someone else could tell you about this mysterious and extremely interesting psychological fact about yourself which you yourself never suspected.
Maybe we should pause to reflect on this: are we really in a stupor? Are most of what we do and think, merely realization of the subconscious desire to pull us out of this void, this emptiness, this stupor?
Why could we be not, like the sky diver, having constantly experienced thrills, uncontroversially interesting events, yet still seek out even greater thrills, not for the need to release from this state of stupor, but for novelty and an even greater life? The maxim "Life could be better" need not be viewed in a depressing light, for it could mean that life can be an ever ascending roller coaster ride (and nevermind the sharp drop at the end).
But perhaps we should ask ourselves, the true arbiter of our feelings, even if we couldnt prove it: are our lives like that of the thrill seeker, or is it mostly nauseously filled with emptiness where we know not what to feel, to be sad or happy, or anything in between?
Then, as we ask that question, like a sudden chill that grips the heart, we cant help but being stunned at the same time by another "Why are we doing all these?"
And hurriedly, without admitting to ourselves that we had ever asked such a frivolous and inane question, pass over it, and bury the thought, along with its unborn answers, with important tasks like eating and doing homework. Just like how you will be forgetting about this post the minute you finished reading it, if you managed to.
The greater part of the day is spent in a daze: we know not what we are doing. Looking back at the end of the day, we can only remember some of the more interesting bits. Looking inward to yourself, what exactly are you feeling now? Happiness? Or some sadness carried over from a previous episode? Or would most of us say, for most of the time, we dont really know what we are feeling at all?
That's why we are constantly searching for interesting bits of news, things to do, anything to wake us up from this stupor, if only momentarily.
That is also the reason why you are reading this at all: to see if there is anything interesting written here, something to pull your attention outwards forcefully, as though to remind yourself that you are alive.
And you cant help but admit, that you feel yourself intrigued by this idea that someone else could tell you about this mysterious and extremely interesting psychological fact about yourself which you yourself never suspected.
Maybe we should pause to reflect on this: are we really in a stupor? Are most of what we do and think, merely realization of the subconscious desire to pull us out of this void, this emptiness, this stupor?
Why could we be not, like the sky diver, having constantly experienced thrills, uncontroversially interesting events, yet still seek out even greater thrills, not for the need to release from this state of stupor, but for novelty and an even greater life? The maxim "Life could be better" need not be viewed in a depressing light, for it could mean that life can be an ever ascending roller coaster ride (and nevermind the sharp drop at the end).
But perhaps we should ask ourselves, the true arbiter of our feelings, even if we couldnt prove it: are our lives like that of the thrill seeker, or is it mostly nauseously filled with emptiness where we know not what to feel, to be sad or happy, or anything in between?
Then, as we ask that question, like a sudden chill that grips the heart, we cant help but being stunned at the same time by another "Why are we doing all these?"
And hurriedly, without admitting to ourselves that we had ever asked such a frivolous and inane question, pass over it, and bury the thought, along with its unborn answers, with important tasks like eating and doing homework. Just like how you will be forgetting about this post the minute you finished reading it, if you managed to.
Monday, September 04, 2006
Love of
At the risk of sounding extremely nerdy, I have decided to jot this down. Some people have, over the years, expressed to me their aversion to studying, how they could not wait to graduate and step into the working world, and how much they dread tests and assignments.
Not a few, have all but said explicitly, felt curiosity, as would be upon encountering a 2 headed snake, when they know I would very much prefer to be studying rather than working, and may even be studying for 7 more years after graduating.
Some even told me, that studying is not everything. That I will realise, upon graduation, Life is more than studying, and that I should do something I really like in the course of my studies, instead of just mindlessly slogging my way through with scant regard for my personal enjoyment.
What these people seem to assume, is that studying couldnt be an end in itself; that it is merely a tool to get what we want in life, but you couldnt be happy doing it; that we needed to do something else to keep our sanity in this tests- and assignments- filled lifestyle.
While I sincerely think the above advice might be true for them, I dont really agree that it is applicable to everyone. Just as beauty is in the eye of the beholder, there are a huge variety of things that a person might like.
Certainly a sense of sadness and pity (for me) would be conveyed when these people know that what I take to be enjoyment is precisely what they think we need some syrup to go down the throat with, but the opposite may be said of them: that it is sad, from my perspective, that these people are doing something they dislike immensely, yet are forced, by themselves no less, to endure.
I do not deny, however, that I dread doing tests and assignments too, or worse, the exams! But despite these, I know I love studying itself, even if I hate hitting the books as much as the next guy.
Once I do start reading though, particularly philosophy, there is a certain fire that runs through my veins, as though the words were leaping off the pages, and overwhelming my brain with rivulets of gold; concepts previously unknown to me slowly shining with a light as they flow into the existing runnels in my brain, harder ones ill-fitting until they carve out new runnels, like tributaries, all flowing into the source of knowledge.
My face would flush, my pen would start twirling to the hidden rhythm in the words, and my mind would wander in the fantasy world where concepts mingle and gave birth to newer ones. Whereupon I would break off from studying, to allow my mind to take a breather, and this is usually the time when I would blog about the newer, more interesting concepts which has nothing to do with philosophy.
There are only 2 events in the whole of my life's experience that would give me these feelings, and one of them is studying philosophy.
And now, you can officially call me a nerd huh. ;-p
Not a few, have all but said explicitly, felt curiosity, as would be upon encountering a 2 headed snake, when they know I would very much prefer to be studying rather than working, and may even be studying for 7 more years after graduating.
Some even told me, that studying is not everything. That I will realise, upon graduation, Life is more than studying, and that I should do something I really like in the course of my studies, instead of just mindlessly slogging my way through with scant regard for my personal enjoyment.
What these people seem to assume, is that studying couldnt be an end in itself; that it is merely a tool to get what we want in life, but you couldnt be happy doing it; that we needed to do something else to keep our sanity in this tests- and assignments- filled lifestyle.
While I sincerely think the above advice might be true for them, I dont really agree that it is applicable to everyone. Just as beauty is in the eye of the beholder, there are a huge variety of things that a person might like.
Certainly a sense of sadness and pity (for me) would be conveyed when these people know that what I take to be enjoyment is precisely what they think we need some syrup to go down the throat with, but the opposite may be said of them: that it is sad, from my perspective, that these people are doing something they dislike immensely, yet are forced, by themselves no less, to endure.
I do not deny, however, that I dread doing tests and assignments too, or worse, the exams! But despite these, I know I love studying itself, even if I hate hitting the books as much as the next guy.
Once I do start reading though, particularly philosophy, there is a certain fire that runs through my veins, as though the words were leaping off the pages, and overwhelming my brain with rivulets of gold; concepts previously unknown to me slowly shining with a light as they flow into the existing runnels in my brain, harder ones ill-fitting until they carve out new runnels, like tributaries, all flowing into the source of knowledge.
My face would flush, my pen would start twirling to the hidden rhythm in the words, and my mind would wander in the fantasy world where concepts mingle and gave birth to newer ones. Whereupon I would break off from studying, to allow my mind to take a breather, and this is usually the time when I would blog about the newer, more interesting concepts which has nothing to do with philosophy.
There are only 2 events in the whole of my life's experience that would give me these feelings, and one of them is studying philosophy.
And now, you can officially call me a nerd huh. ;-p
Sunday, September 03, 2006
Just some random thoughts
1. Maybe someday, we would be able to have some form of control over time. Like able to stop time for a short time, or at least slow it considerably, in a limited space. Then we would be able to have the best fridge in the world, one which doesnt need to operate with lowered temperature at all!
Anything you put in, close the door, and take out a week later, will be as fresh as the day, indeed the moment!, as you put it in. Ice cream can be stored in the same storage area as a hot cup of milo. They wouldnt have time to affect each other's temperature!
2. It is likely that there are people with telepathic abilities walking in our midst, some of them may even be our friends, those who have a special knack for holding in secrets (as unlikely that may seem).
Why then, these people can simply pick thoughts off our brains as easily as eavedropping on conversations, nah, easier! That is how cool. So I think, maybe, with the possibility of having these people around, we should all walk around thinking the following thought all the time in our brains:
Wow you have telepathic abilities! Can you teach me pleasssee?
Perhaps then, some telepathic person will pick that thought straight from our brains, and sensing our sincerity at the same time, volunteer to teach us how to be telepathic! That will be like how cool!
Wow you have telepathic abilities! Can you teach me pleasssee?
Wow you have telepathic abilities! Can you teach me pleasssee?
Wow you have telepathic abilities! Can you teach me pleasssee?
Wow you have telepathic abilities! Can you teach me pleasssee?
Wow you have telepathic abilities! Can you teach me pleasssee?
Wow you have telepathic abilities! Can you teach me pleasssee?
Wow you have telepathic abilities! Can you teach me pleasssee?
Wow you have telepathic abilities! Can you teach me pleasssee?
Wow you have telepathic abilities! Can you teach me pleasssee?
Wow you have telepathic abilities! Can you teach me pleasssee?
Wow you have telepathic abilities! Can you teach me pleasssee?
Anything you put in, close the door, and take out a week later, will be as fresh as the day, indeed the moment!, as you put it in. Ice cream can be stored in the same storage area as a hot cup of milo. They wouldnt have time to affect each other's temperature!
2. It is likely that there are people with telepathic abilities walking in our midst, some of them may even be our friends, those who have a special knack for holding in secrets (as unlikely that may seem).
Why then, these people can simply pick thoughts off our brains as easily as eavedropping on conversations, nah, easier! That is how cool. So I think, maybe, with the possibility of having these people around, we should all walk around thinking the following thought all the time in our brains:
Wow you have telepathic abilities! Can you teach me pleasssee?
Perhaps then, some telepathic person will pick that thought straight from our brains, and sensing our sincerity at the same time, volunteer to teach us how to be telepathic! That will be like how cool!
Wow you have telepathic abilities! Can you teach me pleasssee?
Wow you have telepathic abilities! Can you teach me pleasssee?
Wow you have telepathic abilities! Can you teach me pleasssee?
Wow you have telepathic abilities! Can you teach me pleasssee?
Wow you have telepathic abilities! Can you teach me pleasssee?
Wow you have telepathic abilities! Can you teach me pleasssee?
Wow you have telepathic abilities! Can you teach me pleasssee?
Wow you have telepathic abilities! Can you teach me pleasssee?
Wow you have telepathic abilities! Can you teach me pleasssee?
Wow you have telepathic abilities! Can you teach me pleasssee?
Wow you have telepathic abilities! Can you teach me pleasssee?
Saturday, September 02, 2006
complaining
I've decided not to blog about how absurd life is anymore. For one, if Life is absurd, then anything we do in Life is absurd, including trying to prove that Life is absurd. Hence it was a meaningless exercise after all to blog about it. I dont really have any good arguments for it anyway, it just arose from a gut feeling in me that life is absurd. Besides, blogging about this is boring.
So there... no more such posts.
So I shall blog about other stuff then. For 3years, i have been holding this in, but now i no longer can. Yes, I am going to complain about my classmates, whom I have finally gotten extremely pissed off with.
Not anyone in particular though, just talking about generally what types of classmates piss me off.
Number 1 on my list: interrupters. We have a certain kind of people who like philosophy, and that usually include people who like to argue. Unfortunately, some people obviously think that the license to argue (which they dont have) gives them the license to interrupt the professors and the people they are arguing with.
And sometimes, they pause a while after interrupting, signifying an end of turn, and the professors spoke to answer, but they just snatch the floor back by talking over the professors after they formulated what they were going to say.
Its not that I have a grudge against them, since they never interrupted me (I didnt speak as much as you might think), but I just thought it rude of them to do so.
Number 2 on my list: People with fake accents. Philosophy, the field of debate proper. Obviously you need to have a good command of spoken english to debate properly (which I dont). But some people think they do, and they fake accent to do that. You can tell that its fake when they accentuated certain words at regular intervals in their speech, and when they used the same words again, it might not be accentuated at all, as though they forgot they have to "accent" it. I'd say, if you think your english doesnt sound nice, please dont speak, instead of trying to act angmoh.
Number 3 on my list: Well.. this is quite specific towards some guy, so its not as I said earlier on about not targetting anyone in particular. This guy grunts all the time. Not just unintentionally, like he might have some uncontrollable condition to grunt. He grunts in assent to everything the professors said. Every sentence. "mm mm."
And if he posed a question, and the professors are replying to his questions, he grunts even louder. To every sentence. You can drive a man crazy by grunting so much. Imagine how many sentences can be spoken in a minute. Around 40sentences. Imagine how many that is in a 3hours seminar. Especially when you have to sit next to him. I almost bit my tongue to commit suicide then and there.
Well, I am done ranting. Its no coincidence that none of my classmates have my blog adddress, so I am safe here. lol.
So there... no more such posts.
So I shall blog about other stuff then. For 3years, i have been holding this in, but now i no longer can. Yes, I am going to complain about my classmates, whom I have finally gotten extremely pissed off with.
Not anyone in particular though, just talking about generally what types of classmates piss me off.
Number 1 on my list: interrupters. We have a certain kind of people who like philosophy, and that usually include people who like to argue. Unfortunately, some people obviously think that the license to argue (which they dont have) gives them the license to interrupt the professors and the people they are arguing with.
And sometimes, they pause a while after interrupting, signifying an end of turn, and the professors spoke to answer, but they just snatch the floor back by talking over the professors after they formulated what they were going to say.
Its not that I have a grudge against them, since they never interrupted me (I didnt speak as much as you might think), but I just thought it rude of them to do so.
Number 2 on my list: People with fake accents. Philosophy, the field of debate proper. Obviously you need to have a good command of spoken english to debate properly (which I dont). But some people think they do, and they fake accent to do that. You can tell that its fake when they accentuated certain words at regular intervals in their speech, and when they used the same words again, it might not be accentuated at all, as though they forgot they have to "accent" it. I'd say, if you think your english doesnt sound nice, please dont speak, instead of trying to act angmoh.
Number 3 on my list: Well.. this is quite specific towards some guy, so its not as I said earlier on about not targetting anyone in particular. This guy grunts all the time. Not just unintentionally, like he might have some uncontrollable condition to grunt. He grunts in assent to everything the professors said. Every sentence. "mm mm."
And if he posed a question, and the professors are replying to his questions, he grunts even louder. To every sentence. You can drive a man crazy by grunting so much. Imagine how many sentences can be spoken in a minute. Around 40sentences. Imagine how many that is in a 3hours seminar. Especially when you have to sit next to him. I almost bit my tongue to commit suicide then and there.
Well, I am done ranting. Its no coincidence that none of my classmates have my blog adddress, so I am safe here. lol.
Monday, August 28, 2006
Life is absurd 2
I probably shouldnt have left the previous post hanging for so long as it is. It gives the impression that I have more of a compelling argument for the idea that Life is absurd than I can really lay claim to. In any case, my personal conclusion at the end of this all is not terribly pessimistic anyway, so don't start honing your knives already.
The previous post was more like an introduction and an overview of the entire thread I will be talking about. And the important thing now is to see exactly how absurd life is.
On the surface, it doesnt really seem absurd at all. Look at so many people still leading their lives perfectly fine: no one kneels over from wondering about life, certainly no one have any problem with the notion of living. But perhaps it would be more apparent if we ask more questions about what we do.
For starters: why do we eat? Obviously, the reason is because we hunger. To continue living on for another day, we eat. the same goes for breathing and drinking water, to continue living. Well, the second question now is why do we want to live another day? Presumably some people have a good idea what they are going to do tomorrow, and the day after, maybe even the week after too.
Now we ask again: why do you need to do that which you want to do? I can, for a convenient example, tell you what I want to do by the end of this workyear: I want to graduate from NUS. But whats the point of that? So that I can get a job with a degree? whats the point of getting a job? so that I can earn money to lead a better lifestyle? why do I want to lead a better lifestyle?
That last question is probably where most of us will stop confounded at. Some may go on to say they want to lead a better lifestyle because they feel happier that way. But there really isnt much more space to go beyond that answer. Who, for example, could answer the further question "Why do you want to feel happier?"
Psychologists may be able to do so, drawing on the pleasure centers of the brain as an ultimate explanation why humans generally tend to gravitate towards making themselves happy. But that doesnt sound to me a satisfying answer at all. If we resort to this answer, then all we are saying is that humans are pleasure seeking creatures who don't have any significant purposes in life. All we have are little purposes all ended in trying to satisfy our pleasure centers in our brains.
That brings me to the important bit. So Life is just about satisfying our pleasure centers? All this work to make life happen on this tiny planet called Earth, is just so that the lifeforms would have certain configurations of neurons fire off in certain patterns?
And in case you think there might be a greater purpose that you have been called to Life for, let us think about this scenario which a philosopher proposed. Suppose one day someone came to you and declare that he discovered the True Purpose in life. Suppose that what he said is indeed true and proven beyond any doubts. Suppose he says: "we are all made as food for this higher being. That is our true and ultimate Purpose in life."
Well, that just takes the biscuit doesnt it? Would you yell and scream for joy that you have found the true purpose in life, and feel overjoyed and overwhelmingly satisfied that you have fulfilled your true purpose in life when this higher being reaches out and pop you in its mouth? Would you identify with this Purpose at all? Does it matter a whit what this purpose is (remember it is really what you are given life for)?
So we either have a Purpose which we might not identify with, or we have next to no purpose other than stimulating our neurons to fire off in certain patterns. To a computer observing our antics on the surface of Earth, all this Lively activity is nothing more than a rather complex movement of chemicals and particles, sparking off one reaction after another in a continuous chain. The initial products are some chemicals. The final products are, too, merely some other chemicals. Life is but a colorful name for that complex chemical reaction which goal is to produce a new set of chemicals from the initial reactants.
And who cares about what really goes on in the meantime. Well, we do, some people think. We care about what really goes on in the meantime. But notice that just meant we are interested in overseeing which particular patterns we would like the neurons to fire off in. Why should we care at all, if not simply for the fact that we are physically wired to care without a good reason?
The previous post was more like an introduction and an overview of the entire thread I will be talking about. And the important thing now is to see exactly how absurd life is.
On the surface, it doesnt really seem absurd at all. Look at so many people still leading their lives perfectly fine: no one kneels over from wondering about life, certainly no one have any problem with the notion of living. But perhaps it would be more apparent if we ask more questions about what we do.
For starters: why do we eat? Obviously, the reason is because we hunger. To continue living on for another day, we eat. the same goes for breathing and drinking water, to continue living. Well, the second question now is why do we want to live another day? Presumably some people have a good idea what they are going to do tomorrow, and the day after, maybe even the week after too.
Now we ask again: why do you need to do that which you want to do? I can, for a convenient example, tell you what I want to do by the end of this workyear: I want to graduate from NUS. But whats the point of that? So that I can get a job with a degree? whats the point of getting a job? so that I can earn money to lead a better lifestyle? why do I want to lead a better lifestyle?
That last question is probably where most of us will stop confounded at. Some may go on to say they want to lead a better lifestyle because they feel happier that way. But there really isnt much more space to go beyond that answer. Who, for example, could answer the further question "Why do you want to feel happier?"
Psychologists may be able to do so, drawing on the pleasure centers of the brain as an ultimate explanation why humans generally tend to gravitate towards making themselves happy. But that doesnt sound to me a satisfying answer at all. If we resort to this answer, then all we are saying is that humans are pleasure seeking creatures who don't have any significant purposes in life. All we have are little purposes all ended in trying to satisfy our pleasure centers in our brains.
That brings me to the important bit. So Life is just about satisfying our pleasure centers? All this work to make life happen on this tiny planet called Earth, is just so that the lifeforms would have certain configurations of neurons fire off in certain patterns?
And in case you think there might be a greater purpose that you have been called to Life for, let us think about this scenario which a philosopher proposed. Suppose one day someone came to you and declare that he discovered the True Purpose in life. Suppose that what he said is indeed true and proven beyond any doubts. Suppose he says: "we are all made as food for this higher being. That is our true and ultimate Purpose in life."
Well, that just takes the biscuit doesnt it? Would you yell and scream for joy that you have found the true purpose in life, and feel overjoyed and overwhelmingly satisfied that you have fulfilled your true purpose in life when this higher being reaches out and pop you in its mouth? Would you identify with this Purpose at all? Does it matter a whit what this purpose is (remember it is really what you are given life for)?
So we either have a Purpose which we might not identify with, or we have next to no purpose other than stimulating our neurons to fire off in certain patterns. To a computer observing our antics on the surface of Earth, all this Lively activity is nothing more than a rather complex movement of chemicals and particles, sparking off one reaction after another in a continuous chain. The initial products are some chemicals. The final products are, too, merely some other chemicals. Life is but a colorful name for that complex chemical reaction which goal is to produce a new set of chemicals from the initial reactants.
And who cares about what really goes on in the meantime. Well, we do, some people think. We care about what really goes on in the meantime. But notice that just meant we are interested in overseeing which particular patterns we would like the neurons to fire off in. Why should we care at all, if not simply for the fact that we are physically wired to care without a good reason?
Thursday, August 24, 2006
Life is absurd 1
There is a reason why I wrote a post on suicide earlier on. Many reasons actually, but 1 reason is to induce the fear of suicide in people who do read my blog (in case they feel suicidal after reading one of my lamer posts), the other is that I couldnt possibly write it after I wrote this post, for I would have no way of accounting why we should not simply kill ourselves if Life is absurd.
Fundamentally absurd in fact, not merely absurd. On the most superficial level, life is simply absurd if we realise that to live is to die, and happiness is necessary aftermath of sadness. Fundamentally, life is absurd because it is absurd to assign any purpose to life, in the same way as you can't assign purpose to a stone. I will talk about both.
Firstly, we need an idea of why life is absurd at all. The problem with this age, as I see it, is that too many people have their heads buried in their lives, their work, their studies, so entrenched and so engrossed- perhaps subconciously they too realised that life is essentially meaningless.
We are like the ostrich which buries its head in the sand - we refuse to see how meaningless our lives are, so utterly bleak and absurd, and maybe the sheer absurdity of it is why our minds refuse to countenance the very idea, for fear of going mad entirely or simply giving up in despair.
Every life begins with a fanfare: we receive every newborn with much celebration, smiles and hopes for its future. We hope that it would soon open its eyes, it would soon be able to walk, able to talk, able to write and read and go to school. We want it to grow up into the future. But why? Why do we want it to grow up?
Well, perhaps we find that taking care of a baby is a burden, and we want it to be independent of us. Maybe, and a lot of people would disagree thinking that raising a child when its still a baby is much easier than when its adolescent, but assuming thats true, it would seem that we should be pretty content when the baby is around 6 years of age. And we should get happier and happier that it grows older and older. But why? Do we in fact, get happier and happier that the baby grows up? For what reason if we do?
There seems to be no particular reason why we want the baby to grow up. And when the baby, now no longer appropriately called the baby, reached 40years of age, suddenly we turn our attention away, and instead of hoping that he will grow up, we hope instead that he would have a baby that would grow up.
Well, what happen to the man now? Do we stop hoping that he would grow older? Why do we stop doing so, if we ever do? Or do we in fact hope that he would continue to grow older and older?
So many questions, but all just laying the ground for this question: why do we celebrate life at all? What is so great about life? Is it advantageous to us that we live, or any other person for the matter? I cannot finish this post today, but I will leave you peeps with this excerpt written by the German philosopher Johann Gottlieb Fichte who described the meaninglessness of life aptly, and in an entirely more direct manner:
I should eat and drink, only in order to hunger and thirst again, and eat and drink, merely until the open grave under my feet swallows me up as a meal for the earth? Should I create more beings like myself, so that they can eat and drink and die, and so they can leave behind beings of their own, so that they can do the same as I have already done? What is the point of this continual, self-contained and ever-returning circle, this repetitive game that always starts again in the same way, in which everything is, in order to fade away, and fades away, only in order to return again as it was - this monster, continually devouring itself in order to reproduce itself, and reproduce itself, in order to devour itself?
Fundamentally absurd in fact, not merely absurd. On the most superficial level, life is simply absurd if we realise that to live is to die, and happiness is necessary aftermath of sadness. Fundamentally, life is absurd because it is absurd to assign any purpose to life, in the same way as you can't assign purpose to a stone. I will talk about both.
Firstly, we need an idea of why life is absurd at all. The problem with this age, as I see it, is that too many people have their heads buried in their lives, their work, their studies, so entrenched and so engrossed- perhaps subconciously they too realised that life is essentially meaningless.
We are like the ostrich which buries its head in the sand - we refuse to see how meaningless our lives are, so utterly bleak and absurd, and maybe the sheer absurdity of it is why our minds refuse to countenance the very idea, for fear of going mad entirely or simply giving up in despair.
Every life begins with a fanfare: we receive every newborn with much celebration, smiles and hopes for its future. We hope that it would soon open its eyes, it would soon be able to walk, able to talk, able to write and read and go to school. We want it to grow up into the future. But why? Why do we want it to grow up?
Well, perhaps we find that taking care of a baby is a burden, and we want it to be independent of us. Maybe, and a lot of people would disagree thinking that raising a child when its still a baby is much easier than when its adolescent, but assuming thats true, it would seem that we should be pretty content when the baby is around 6 years of age. And we should get happier and happier that it grows older and older. But why? Do we in fact, get happier and happier that the baby grows up? For what reason if we do?
There seems to be no particular reason why we want the baby to grow up. And when the baby, now no longer appropriately called the baby, reached 40years of age, suddenly we turn our attention away, and instead of hoping that he will grow up, we hope instead that he would have a baby that would grow up.
Well, what happen to the man now? Do we stop hoping that he would grow older? Why do we stop doing so, if we ever do? Or do we in fact hope that he would continue to grow older and older?
So many questions, but all just laying the ground for this question: why do we celebrate life at all? What is so great about life? Is it advantageous to us that we live, or any other person for the matter? I cannot finish this post today, but I will leave you peeps with this excerpt written by the German philosopher Johann Gottlieb Fichte who described the meaninglessness of life aptly, and in an entirely more direct manner:
I should eat and drink, only in order to hunger and thirst again, and eat and drink, merely until the open grave under my feet swallows me up as a meal for the earth? Should I create more beings like myself, so that they can eat and drink and die, and so they can leave behind beings of their own, so that they can do the same as I have already done? What is the point of this continual, self-contained and ever-returning circle, this repetitive game that always starts again in the same way, in which everything is, in order to fade away, and fades away, only in order to return again as it was - this monster, continually devouring itself in order to reproduce itself, and reproduce itself, in order to devour itself?
Tuesday, August 22, 2006
u can tell i am bored huh.
Honorary Mosquito Captain: And so we are all gathered here today for your graduation briefing, whereupon Commencement, you are released into the wild, figuratively speaking, to begin your short but ardous career of sucking human blood. Any questions at this point of time?
Mosquito A: I don't remember having taking any courses on sucking blood, where did this graduation ceremony come from??
Mosquito B: I don't remember seeing you either... why are you the Honorary Mosquito Captain?
Capt: Trivial and pointless questions. Really, we mosquitoes should start using our puny brains and not asking silly questions like these, for fear of appearing vacuous.
Any more stupid questions? No? Then I shall start my briefing proper. As you are about to embark on your holy mission to suck human blood, there are a few points to note... Yes? You got a question to ask?
Mosquito C: Ya, why is sucking human blood a holy thing to do? You mean its like we have to perform some rituals prior to sticking our mouths into their skins? That would be sooooo troublesome...
Capt: No, no... Not holy in the sense that you must perform obscene rituals (Mosquito C: I didnt say obscene...), but in the sense that it is a mission given to us by God to save human lives from extinction, and indeed, make them better for it.
Mosquito A,B, and C: Wow....
Capt: The idea is that humans have too much blood. Any experienced mosquito could tell you noobies that if you puncture the skin of any human, their blood will spurt out uncontrollably. That is a sign of high blood pressure, the blood moving from a place of high pressure to low pressure, seeking release from the confines of the taut, high-tensioned skin.
As we all know, high blood pressure is not good for humans, so we are on this mission to help them release some of the pressure in their bodies. You guys have heard of leeches, I presume?
Mosquitoes: Ya. The worm-like bastards right?
Capt: Well, those bastards are our allies: together we form the Universal Blood Service, bound in the mission to relieve humans of their high-pressured blood. The problem is that the leeches are quite rural in nature, and they refuse to leave the forest to service the city-dwellers. So it is up to us mobile units to spread all over the world in aid of the needys.
Mosquitoes: ooooohhh...
Mosquito B: Wait a minute Capt. If our mission is so holy and important as you made it out to be, why do we see humans trying to kill us mosquitoes whenever we try to suck their blood? I mean, I certainly havent been trying yet, but my mother and my cousins and my aunt and grandmother etc., all have died trying. They wouldnt be killing us if we are helping them, would they?
Capt: Of course not. The humans are eternally grateful to us Blood Servicers, and they long to show it. I must say your family has an unfortunate streak of bad luck to be constantly, accidentally, being killed by humans. We must understand that humans, being humans, have human reflexes, and it is natural that they slap their arms and legs whenever they feel the itch. It is most unfortunate when the Blood Servicers are in the way and got squashed unintentionally. But that is okay, since we got so many of us anyway.
Mosquito C: But I heard them cursing and swearing vehemently after we bit them...
Capt: Alright, no more inane questions and smart-aleck remarks.
Back to the pointers I promised you people: as we all know, human blood is sour and quite salty, not tasty at all, as they might have been inclined to think (those egoistic fools). To make our job easier and altogether more palatable, literally speaking, there are certain prime areas we should target, where the blood is fresher, sweeter, and pose less occupational hazard to us blood servicers. Places like the human eyelids, the ear lobes, the elbows and kneecaps, the knuckles on their fingers and toes, are the parallel of fish cheeks: the tastiest part of a fish which anyone should go for...
Mosquito C: Excuse me, what is this "fish cheeks" you are talking about? Have any mosquito actually eaten any of it? I thought we can only siphon liquid?
Capt: Right, forgive my slip. And I was saying, before I was kindly interrupted by a rude cadet, we should always go for places like the eyelids and earlobes, them possessing the freshest supply of blood with minimum amount of cholesterol and cancer causing agents; and the bony areas like elbows and knuckles where the risk of being accidentally slapped is reduced to a minimum.
Second point, we have received reports of sick mosquitoes who went around sucking blood, thus infecting their patients with the disease they carry. The good news is that apparently the disease most commonly carried by these sick mosquitoes, dengue, is not fatal at all, in fact, have hardly any effect on us mosquitoes, and hence presumably, the humans too. The bad news is that the paranoid humans have apparently filed a complaint to our Supreme Commanders, requesting the removal of these infected, but harmless, mosquitoes from the task force. Thus all of you, prior to graduation, would be required to go through a health check, which would be tedious and pointless imo, but over which you have no choice over.
The details of the health check will be briefed to you by that nurse over there, and I've heard it is relatively simple, just requiring you to poke your mouth into a volunteer human and see if he gets infected. Or something like that. Quite easy I should think.
Well, thats all for today. Dismiss.
Mosquito A: I don't remember having taking any courses on sucking blood, where did this graduation ceremony come from??
Mosquito B: I don't remember seeing you either... why are you the Honorary Mosquito Captain?
Capt: Trivial and pointless questions. Really, we mosquitoes should start using our puny brains and not asking silly questions like these, for fear of appearing vacuous.
Any more stupid questions? No? Then I shall start my briefing proper. As you are about to embark on your holy mission to suck human blood, there are a few points to note... Yes? You got a question to ask?
Mosquito C: Ya, why is sucking human blood a holy thing to do? You mean its like we have to perform some rituals prior to sticking our mouths into their skins? That would be sooooo troublesome...
Capt: No, no... Not holy in the sense that you must perform obscene rituals (Mosquito C: I didnt say obscene...), but in the sense that it is a mission given to us by God to save human lives from extinction, and indeed, make them better for it.
Mosquito A,B, and C: Wow....
Capt: The idea is that humans have too much blood. Any experienced mosquito could tell you noobies that if you puncture the skin of any human, their blood will spurt out uncontrollably. That is a sign of high blood pressure, the blood moving from a place of high pressure to low pressure, seeking release from the confines of the taut, high-tensioned skin.
As we all know, high blood pressure is not good for humans, so we are on this mission to help them release some of the pressure in their bodies. You guys have heard of leeches, I presume?
Mosquitoes: Ya. The worm-like bastards right?
Capt: Well, those bastards are our allies: together we form the Universal Blood Service, bound in the mission to relieve humans of their high-pressured blood. The problem is that the leeches are quite rural in nature, and they refuse to leave the forest to service the city-dwellers. So it is up to us mobile units to spread all over the world in aid of the needys.
Mosquitoes: ooooohhh...
Mosquito B: Wait a minute Capt. If our mission is so holy and important as you made it out to be, why do we see humans trying to kill us mosquitoes whenever we try to suck their blood? I mean, I certainly havent been trying yet, but my mother and my cousins and my aunt and grandmother etc., all have died trying. They wouldnt be killing us if we are helping them, would they?
Capt: Of course not. The humans are eternally grateful to us Blood Servicers, and they long to show it. I must say your family has an unfortunate streak of bad luck to be constantly, accidentally, being killed by humans. We must understand that humans, being humans, have human reflexes, and it is natural that they slap their arms and legs whenever they feel the itch. It is most unfortunate when the Blood Servicers are in the way and got squashed unintentionally. But that is okay, since we got so many of us anyway.
Mosquito C: But I heard them cursing and swearing vehemently after we bit them...
Capt: Alright, no more inane questions and smart-aleck remarks.
Back to the pointers I promised you people: as we all know, human blood is sour and quite salty, not tasty at all, as they might have been inclined to think (those egoistic fools). To make our job easier and altogether more palatable, literally speaking, there are certain prime areas we should target, where the blood is fresher, sweeter, and pose less occupational hazard to us blood servicers. Places like the human eyelids, the ear lobes, the elbows and kneecaps, the knuckles on their fingers and toes, are the parallel of fish cheeks: the tastiest part of a fish which anyone should go for...
Mosquito C: Excuse me, what is this "fish cheeks" you are talking about? Have any mosquito actually eaten any of it? I thought we can only siphon liquid?
Capt: Right, forgive my slip. And I was saying, before I was kindly interrupted by a rude cadet, we should always go for places like the eyelids and earlobes, them possessing the freshest supply of blood with minimum amount of cholesterol and cancer causing agents; and the bony areas like elbows and knuckles where the risk of being accidentally slapped is reduced to a minimum.
Second point, we have received reports of sick mosquitoes who went around sucking blood, thus infecting their patients with the disease they carry. The good news is that apparently the disease most commonly carried by these sick mosquitoes, dengue, is not fatal at all, in fact, have hardly any effect on us mosquitoes, and hence presumably, the humans too. The bad news is that the paranoid humans have apparently filed a complaint to our Supreme Commanders, requesting the removal of these infected, but harmless, mosquitoes from the task force. Thus all of you, prior to graduation, would be required to go through a health check, which would be tedious and pointless imo, but over which you have no choice over.
The details of the health check will be briefed to you by that nurse over there, and I've heard it is relatively simple, just requiring you to poke your mouth into a volunteer human and see if he gets infected. Or something like that. Quite easy I should think.
Well, thats all for today. Dismiss.
Sunday, August 20, 2006
Suicide
We dont need official figures to know that suicide rates have gone up significantly since the 19th century. In fact, it is probably true that with a high level of education, a country is likely to have a high rate of suicide. I didnt devise that hypothesis, but it might be explicable in terms of human psyche.
What I think, though, is not so much that education indirectly, or directly, induce more people to consider suicide as a viable option, but the crucial factor lies in another vaguely related, altogther more widespread medium: the media.
In a way that resembles advertising, the media constantly portrays people committing suicide - to reflect the society the producers see maybe, to create dramatic endings maybe, for many reasons, some forgivable. What this amounts to is to create a acute awareness of a seemingly viable option on how to "lead one's life" if in a rather warped sense, when things get worse.
Of course, I am not accusing the media of first instilling the idea of suicide in people: most people would probably get the idea of suicide after the first death they witness, and there are countless of it, of animals dying, of relatives passing away etc. The media may have influenced a few kids to contemplate suicide, but that is probably only a fraction of the sea of people who actually were considering suicide.
The fault of media, as I see it, is the fact that media only portray the before and after decision to suicide, neglecting the middle segment, thus giving its audience the false impression that suicide is an easy and painless course of action to take.
It is natural, on the part of the producers, to cut down on the scenes leading up to any decision making on suicide: deciding on suicide is afterall, a boring thing on the surface to any observer. Moreover, they couldnt really capture the falling of bodies from great heights accurately, and the great anxiety suiciders feel at the moment of jumping/slitting their wrists, the tremendous fear while falling, the near overwhelming fear while in mid air of slamming into the hard ground, and the great pain that does issue from doing so at the end.
For viewers, and hence potential suiciders, the decisions to suicide only amounts to a few scenes: decide on committing suicide, standing on th edge of a building followed by a jump, and a scene cut, whereby the person is shown sprawling on the ground 30 stories down (in reality, most suiciders dont die that prettily either).
We add into the mix, the novelty of bungee jumping, thus giving people the illusion that the fear one experienced while in mid air isnt really that great, for thrill seekers do that all the time, and with relatively low casualties. Then, subconsciously they might think, the actual thing to fear during the whole process is merely the instant of slamming into ground, which isnt that great, for it is afterall, an instant only. Suicide becomes a quick and clean process of solving one's problems in life.
But what do we know about dying, really? Do we really die that fast? With great pain that the brain cant comprehend and thus shuts down the entire functioning of the body in an instant? What if we really couldnt die that fast? Maybe at the end of a fall, our limbs flew apart, our mouths refuse to work properly, but for a second or a minute, our brains continue to experience the immense agony of -censored- ?
Less vividly, we know that Time is relative. In a simple manner, time passes slower when you are doing things you dont enjoy, but faster when you are doing things you like. How far can we carry this notion? I like to run with it, and think about time while dying. No one would really like dying that much. Perhaps when one is dying, time stretches out for you: what seemed like a split-second to an observer may be an eternity of pain for you.
That may sound like some works of fiction, where everyone simply stops in time at the point of dying, forever in a state of limbo. The concept, however, isnt that elusive to grasp, for we know that advancing into Black Holes creates almost the same effect. While in the case of dying, I postulated the dying would experience a lengthening of time, for the case of black holes, it is the observer who have that experience.
Titbit: For a spaceship which is advancing directly into a black hole, the occupants will feel as normal as any regular person moving forward into their death - crushing death at the end of this one. For any observer, however, who is observing from quite a safe distance away, the spaceship would never reach the blackhole: it will first slow down, then stop entirely on the event horizon. For more on this, you should read it up on your own and not trust any of my details.
My conclusion is that, dying may not seem to be the quick, painless event that the media portrays, the illusion that it is may have encouraged more people to choose suicide as a viable option than we ever suspected.
What I think, though, is not so much that education indirectly, or directly, induce more people to consider suicide as a viable option, but the crucial factor lies in another vaguely related, altogther more widespread medium: the media.
In a way that resembles advertising, the media constantly portrays people committing suicide - to reflect the society the producers see maybe, to create dramatic endings maybe, for many reasons, some forgivable. What this amounts to is to create a acute awareness of a seemingly viable option on how to "lead one's life" if in a rather warped sense, when things get worse.
Of course, I am not accusing the media of first instilling the idea of suicide in people: most people would probably get the idea of suicide after the first death they witness, and there are countless of it, of animals dying, of relatives passing away etc. The media may have influenced a few kids to contemplate suicide, but that is probably only a fraction of the sea of people who actually were considering suicide.
The fault of media, as I see it, is the fact that media only portray the before and after decision to suicide, neglecting the middle segment, thus giving its audience the false impression that suicide is an easy and painless course of action to take.
It is natural, on the part of the producers, to cut down on the scenes leading up to any decision making on suicide: deciding on suicide is afterall, a boring thing on the surface to any observer. Moreover, they couldnt really capture the falling of bodies from great heights accurately, and the great anxiety suiciders feel at the moment of jumping/slitting their wrists, the tremendous fear while falling, the near overwhelming fear while in mid air of slamming into the hard ground, and the great pain that does issue from doing so at the end.
For viewers, and hence potential suiciders, the decisions to suicide only amounts to a few scenes: decide on committing suicide, standing on th edge of a building followed by a jump, and a scene cut, whereby the person is shown sprawling on the ground 30 stories down (in reality, most suiciders dont die that prettily either).
We add into the mix, the novelty of bungee jumping, thus giving people the illusion that the fear one experienced while in mid air isnt really that great, for thrill seekers do that all the time, and with relatively low casualties. Then, subconsciously they might think, the actual thing to fear during the whole process is merely the instant of slamming into ground, which isnt that great, for it is afterall, an instant only. Suicide becomes a quick and clean process of solving one's problems in life.
But what do we know about dying, really? Do we really die that fast? With great pain that the brain cant comprehend and thus shuts down the entire functioning of the body in an instant? What if we really couldnt die that fast? Maybe at the end of a fall, our limbs flew apart, our mouths refuse to work properly, but for a second or a minute, our brains continue to experience the immense agony of -censored- ?
Less vividly, we know that Time is relative. In a simple manner, time passes slower when you are doing things you dont enjoy, but faster when you are doing things you like. How far can we carry this notion? I like to run with it, and think about time while dying. No one would really like dying that much. Perhaps when one is dying, time stretches out for you: what seemed like a split-second to an observer may be an eternity of pain for you.
That may sound like some works of fiction, where everyone simply stops in time at the point of dying, forever in a state of limbo. The concept, however, isnt that elusive to grasp, for we know that advancing into Black Holes creates almost the same effect. While in the case of dying, I postulated the dying would experience a lengthening of time, for the case of black holes, it is the observer who have that experience.
Titbit: For a spaceship which is advancing directly into a black hole, the occupants will feel as normal as any regular person moving forward into their death - crushing death at the end of this one. For any observer, however, who is observing from quite a safe distance away, the spaceship would never reach the blackhole: it will first slow down, then stop entirely on the event horizon. For more on this, you should read it up on your own and not trust any of my details.
My conclusion is that, dying may not seem to be the quick, painless event that the media portrays, the illusion that it is may have encouraged more people to choose suicide as a viable option than we ever suspected.
Tuesday, August 15, 2006
Radio songs
If you are, like me, one who listen to the radio every now and then, then this might happen, or have happened to you before. Particularly if its a hits station like 987fm, where new songs are introduced almost every week, where the chances that you might like a song immediately is quite high, then this almost certainly will happen to you.
Some songs you take to it immediately, like love at first sight, this is love at first hearing. Some songs, however, doesnt sound impressive at all initially, but after a few weeks, or a few months later when you hear it again, it doesnt seem all that bad after all. Maybe it brought back memories when you first heard it, or maybe things do get better after you are accustomed to them, but in any case, you got to like them eventually.
At the point of loving the song, most people would have the urge to own it. Either they buy it in cd form, or they download it, legally or otherwise, then immediately play it ad infinitum. And as most people could attest to, playing a song too many times, favorite or not, is the best way to get sick of it fast. Appreciation for the song will drop; what had seem like a revolutionary new way of expressing your emotions now appear more cliche than not; doubts began playing in your mind whether the drums/etc. may have been rather jarring than in perfect harmony with the beats.
On the other hand, if it happens that, for some reason, you didnt get the song (you might have forgotten to download it, or the cd shop ran out of the copies etc), gradually you might get to like that elusive song more and more; like a perfect heaven forever out of reach, giving you a taste of it every now and then when you heard it over the radio; tantalising, rather than satisfying your desire for listening to it at whim, ad infinitum.
In the end, you would have gotten the song by whatever means, then you realise that perhaps if you have gotten it immediately initially, the level of appreciation for it would never have reached this high, and you would never have stayed so loyal to it for so long a time. And perhaps, because of this interim, your love for it would have grown to the point that no matter how many times you listen to it now, you would not get sick of it, as like you would if you had gotten it immediately.
Human psyche works in weird ways. Or at least, mine does.
Some songs you take to it immediately, like love at first sight, this is love at first hearing. Some songs, however, doesnt sound impressive at all initially, but after a few weeks, or a few months later when you hear it again, it doesnt seem all that bad after all. Maybe it brought back memories when you first heard it, or maybe things do get better after you are accustomed to them, but in any case, you got to like them eventually.
At the point of loving the song, most people would have the urge to own it. Either they buy it in cd form, or they download it, legally or otherwise, then immediately play it ad infinitum. And as most people could attest to, playing a song too many times, favorite or not, is the best way to get sick of it fast. Appreciation for the song will drop; what had seem like a revolutionary new way of expressing your emotions now appear more cliche than not; doubts began playing in your mind whether the drums/etc. may have been rather jarring than in perfect harmony with the beats.
On the other hand, if it happens that, for some reason, you didnt get the song (you might have forgotten to download it, or the cd shop ran out of the copies etc), gradually you might get to like that elusive song more and more; like a perfect heaven forever out of reach, giving you a taste of it every now and then when you heard it over the radio; tantalising, rather than satisfying your desire for listening to it at whim, ad infinitum.
In the end, you would have gotten the song by whatever means, then you realise that perhaps if you have gotten it immediately initially, the level of appreciation for it would never have reached this high, and you would never have stayed so loyal to it for so long a time. And perhaps, because of this interim, your love for it would have grown to the point that no matter how many times you listen to it now, you would not get sick of it, as like you would if you had gotten it immediately.
Human psyche works in weird ways. Or at least, mine does.
Tuesday, August 08, 2006
National Day
Nope, its not National Day yet as of now, but I did go to school today for some National Day Observance Ceremony.
Its really nothing much... went there to sing song take pledge with the old folks (aka NUS President, and alumnus). The whole thing lasted like 15mins... and i spent the night before rooting out my shirt and tie.. =_=" , not to mention 1/2hr dressing up and 1hr travelling.
I nearly forgot how to sing that national day anthem. its been like 5years since I last sang it? the pledge sounds funny to me too.. been too long. hahaa. had a short tea reception, then went home. There was only like 4youngsters at the whole thing, excludin the choir. sian.
Its really nothing much... went there to sing song take pledge with the old folks (aka NUS President, and alumnus). The whole thing lasted like 15mins... and i spent the night before rooting out my shirt and tie.. =_=" , not to mention 1/2hr dressing up and 1hr travelling.
I nearly forgot how to sing that national day anthem. its been like 5years since I last sang it? the pledge sounds funny to me too.. been too long. hahaa. had a short tea reception, then went home. There was only like 4youngsters at the whole thing, excludin the choir. sian.
Sunday, August 06, 2006
confidence
There are two types of people in this world (I always wanted to write that phrase, but never got around to doing it properly), one egoistic, the other insecure. They both lie on the ends of the same continuum, of which somewhere in the middle lies the elusive point of being confident.
The egoistic type, in a bid to appear confident, or simply because it is in his nature to boost, always purports to preach and teach "the best ways" or "the correct view" to others (yes, I am well-aware of the irony here). Its almost instinctual at most situations, the egoistic would be the one constantly talking, telling people how they should feel, how the situations should be analysed, and how he's "been there, done that" and thus his ways should be more trustworthy. Rarely does he pause to reflect if his ways are really the best choices one could have.
The Insecure, also trying to appear confident, constantly insists on his own ways of doing things. Frequently being mistaken for the Egoistic, the Insecure does not, unlike the Egoistic, thinks that his ways are the best ways to do things. He just wanted to be different, to be confident of his own methods of doing things, resulting in him insisting too much on his ways and deaf to other alternatives.
The Confident, is not really a balance between the Insecure and the Egoistic, but more of a happy-go-lucky person who doesnt insist on his own ways, nor is constantly preaching about what are the best ways or paying lip-service to finding them. The Confident is satisfied with doing things in the best way he knows, quietly and without thinking they are indeed the best ways possible, and always ready to review his ways and measure them carefully in light of new alternatives.
The egoistic type, in a bid to appear confident, or simply because it is in his nature to boost, always purports to preach and teach "the best ways" or "the correct view" to others (yes, I am well-aware of the irony here). Its almost instinctual at most situations, the egoistic would be the one constantly talking, telling people how they should feel, how the situations should be analysed, and how he's "been there, done that" and thus his ways should be more trustworthy. Rarely does he pause to reflect if his ways are really the best choices one could have.
The Insecure, also trying to appear confident, constantly insists on his own ways of doing things. Frequently being mistaken for the Egoistic, the Insecure does not, unlike the Egoistic, thinks that his ways are the best ways to do things. He just wanted to be different, to be confident of his own methods of doing things, resulting in him insisting too much on his ways and deaf to other alternatives.
The Confident, is not really a balance between the Insecure and the Egoistic, but more of a happy-go-lucky person who doesnt insist on his own ways, nor is constantly preaching about what are the best ways or paying lip-service to finding them. The Confident is satisfied with doing things in the best way he knows, quietly and without thinking they are indeed the best ways possible, and always ready to review his ways and measure them carefully in light of new alternatives.
Tuesday, August 01, 2006
Destiny
Only recently my mum broke some bad news to me. Or rather, some bad news for me, which may in all probability be good news for you, them, or the entire mankind.
Well, the story is that when I was still very young, my mum consulted a fortune teller about our futures (me and my sis). What the fortune teller said is something like this: I would have romance when I am age 24.
But the problem now is, as some of you would not notice, is that these fortune tellers go by the lunar calender, and we are in reality, all 1 year older than what our NRIC claim us to be. So I am already 25 years old by chinese reckoning. That means that my age for romance has past!
That wouldnt be so bad if it werent for a television show I watched when I was very young again (witness the corrupting influence of TV on young minds): the show's entire theme was explicitly that if you missed your yin yuan, then you are destined to lead the rest of your life alone!
Its like a window, a one shot chance at getting someone to accompany you for the rest of your life; once you missed that chance, you are going to be stuck on that train which goes chute-chute away without ever stopping again.
Woe be me!
On the other hand, not that I really believe all these stuff anyway. But they are quite fun to talk about.
Well, the story is that when I was still very young, my mum consulted a fortune teller about our futures (me and my sis). What the fortune teller said is something like this: I would have romance when I am age 24.
But the problem now is, as some of you would not notice, is that these fortune tellers go by the lunar calender, and we are in reality, all 1 year older than what our NRIC claim us to be. So I am already 25 years old by chinese reckoning. That means that my age for romance has past!
That wouldnt be so bad if it werent for a television show I watched when I was very young again (witness the corrupting influence of TV on young minds): the show's entire theme was explicitly that if you missed your yin yuan, then you are destined to lead the rest of your life alone!
Its like a window, a one shot chance at getting someone to accompany you for the rest of your life; once you missed that chance, you are going to be stuck on that train which goes chute-chute away without ever stopping again.
Woe be me!
On the other hand, not that I really believe all these stuff anyway. But they are quite fun to talk about.
Tuesday, July 25, 2006
selfish
Because we are all humans, we are born with some innate capacity to take care of ourselves, strictly speaking, oneself, and this goes beyond the need to feed and clothe oneself. We are perhaps more selfish than we would ever want to admit to ourselves, but it is also this selfishness that allow us to survive at all.
The prerequisite of survival is selfishness: cooperation may be an excellent way of improving our lives, or even chances of long term survival, but without selfishness, we cant even talk about cooperation, not when cooperation is tolerated ultimately for the condition of personal survival. (if personal survival is not guaranteed most of the time, then no one would ever cooperate.)
Thus it is no surprise that language has evolved around this concept of selfishness, and came up with many defensive phrases. Phrases like "I told you so", "I knew that would happen", "You should have" etc. are actually defensive, with the intent of putting the spotlight on the other person, shifting the blame away from oneself.
While on the receiving end, such phrases sound especially offensive and annoying, they sound equally irritating to others who are merely observing the exchange, for subconsciously, they recognise the human's baser instinct to be defensive and shift blame away from oneself, and from a community point of view, any egoistic maneuvers are to be condemned.
Hence there developed an interesting relationship between self and society, a paradox if Kant were alive to say it: the self wants to, needs to in fact, be selfish, but the society frowns upon such acts; the society however, is not any abstract entity overlooking the whole mankind, but made up of countless other selves who themselves want to and need to be selfish.
In short: while we all need to be selfish, others dont like us to be, even though they need to be selfish as well.
The prerequisite of survival is selfishness: cooperation may be an excellent way of improving our lives, or even chances of long term survival, but without selfishness, we cant even talk about cooperation, not when cooperation is tolerated ultimately for the condition of personal survival. (if personal survival is not guaranteed most of the time, then no one would ever cooperate.)
Thus it is no surprise that language has evolved around this concept of selfishness, and came up with many defensive phrases. Phrases like "I told you so", "I knew that would happen", "You should have" etc. are actually defensive, with the intent of putting the spotlight on the other person, shifting the blame away from oneself.
While on the receiving end, such phrases sound especially offensive and annoying, they sound equally irritating to others who are merely observing the exchange, for subconsciously, they recognise the human's baser instinct to be defensive and shift blame away from oneself, and from a community point of view, any egoistic maneuvers are to be condemned.
Hence there developed an interesting relationship between self and society, a paradox if Kant were alive to say it: the self wants to, needs to in fact, be selfish, but the society frowns upon such acts; the society however, is not any abstract entity overlooking the whole mankind, but made up of countless other selves who themselves want to and need to be selfish.
In short: while we all need to be selfish, others dont like us to be, even though they need to be selfish as well.
Friday, July 14, 2006
tag
I just realised that I could tag some people to do the dumb thing I did in the previous post. And because I know it would annoy my friends to be tagged (some of them particularly), I hereby tag dominic, yx, yongcen, wei yee, peckleng. hehee.
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