blogs

I've come to a decision regarding my 2 blogs that I am currently maintaining. Or rather, a decision to not make a decision. Thats right, I will continue to maintain both blogs, the blogger one and the vox one. The posts will be roughly alternating between both blogs to give some semblance of maintenance.

I know people say that we should try not to be indecisive, and that its not good to drag your decisions till problems crop up, but hey, this isnt about deciding between two girls anyway, so who cares.

I will be trying to blog more of my sensitive posts in Vox, and the more mundane posts in blogger. If you want my vox address, look at the right side where it says "Clement's other blog".

Christmas Day

Christmas only serves to remind me how lonely I feel.

Christmas resolution: to not fall in love for the next 6 years.

My idea of a perfect Christmas Eve

Its the whole empty house all to myself, where the rest of my family went off to church after unsuccessfully badgering me for a few weeks to go. Naturally, I expect a few days of cold war again, as is always the case. Fits with the season I guess. Cold. Get it?

So yea, I figured I should take a break from my applications (oh those accursed forms!) and actually read a book or something. Pretty ambitious plans for a day I must say, except for one thing: I've read all my books thrice over and more, and I simply cant bear to read them again today, and definitely not the academic ones. So I jaunt off to the library after making sure that they have the book I wanted in the shelves by checking online, planning to spend the rest of the day finishing the novel.

Except that they dont have it, even though it says Not-on-Loan in the library catalog. Neat. So I came back home, and watched some dvds alone. I mean, with my headache which decided to pop in and say hi after a week's absence.

Seriously, with the empty house playing my typing sounds back at me, and the thoughts that I have trillions of things left undone, plans for the future, worries about the opposite sex, I think I'm cool. Fits in with the season again.

And I have absolutely no idea what to do. I mean short term wise, for the day. I cant play games on this computer, since its not mine, and I cant do work today, cos I dont feel like doing it. No books to read, no one to talk to, nothing to do.

It's times like this when you really feel you need a girlfriend --so you wouldnt be coped up at home reading my blog complaining about how lousy I feel. Sorry, perfect*. How perfect I feel.

offline

This is extremely fucked up. First my pc keeps dying, now my monitor went completely bonkers, near irreparable. I still need to do my applications for the overseas universities!! This is a conspiracy to keep me from going!! (by whom I dont know however, since I am the only one who uses my pc.)

I cant play games, I cant do stuff, cant go online for maybe a month or more, unless i use my sis's pc while she isnt looking, which is exactly what I am doing now. And I dont intend to buy a new monitor. Not going to feed more money into that poor excuse of a computer. Will buy a laptop when I am free. Fuck, needs more money again.

path of least resistance

It's very easy to just flow along the path of least resistance, and lead an easy life; relying on fortuitous events instead of actively creating luck for oneself. I wonder what my life would be like if I choose to just graduate with a Bachelor degree, and I certainly wonder what my life would be like if I choose to do further studies. What I do know is only that I rather dislike a non-academic life.

I have a friend who thinks that she probably doesnt want to rewind time even if given the choice to do so, and I kinda agree with her. Even if we can change past events, I'm not sure if we should do so. However much we might dislike our current situation, there is no telling that we might have hated any other possible alternatives.

Still have to write a statement of purpose for my overseas applications... Feels like hecking it already. Bleah.

sleep

My dad is an insomniac,

my mum is a very light sleeper.

No prize for guessing what I am like.


p.s. I have a new blog at Vox, where I havent posted anything substantial at yet. Will get around to it some day, and also decide how I am to manage these blogs. http://idarhl.vox.com/

webs

And suddenly the magic is gone -
henceforth, wouldn't be caught
so easily again.

Technology

Since I mentioned Douglas Adams in my previous post, I thought it would be cool to quote him again regarding what he has to say about technology, which I found to be awesomely witty and true to a large extent. 'Nuff said, enjoy.

"I've come up with a set of rules that describes our reactions to technologies:

"1. Anything that is in the world when you're born is normal and ordinary and is just a natural part of the way the world works.

"2. Anything that's invented between when you're fifteen and thirty-five is new and exciting and revolutionary and you can probably get a career in it.

"3. Anything invented after you're thirty-five is against the natural order of things."
-Adams, Douglas. The Salmon of Doubt.

weather

We don't like it when it rains: when the sky is overcast, dark with foreboding clouds, weeping raindrops as though crying; for it makes us sad. (Actually I don't dislike raining, but I needed to say this for dramatic effect.)

We don't like it when it's sunny: with the scalding sun bearing down on us, like a powerful drum keeping up a beat that our reluctant hearts are forced along unwillingly.

We hate it when it's cold: when the frosty air forces us to wrap ourselves in layers of stifling materials, the cold seeping into our bones, leeching the life from them, leaving us shivering and helpless. (Again, I actually love being cold, but I can't very well say that now.)

We definitely hate it when it's hot: the oppressing heat like a wet and dirty pillow pressing down on our mouths and noses, cooking the sticky sweat from every pore in our skin.

Well then, what about when it's not too hot, nor too cold; when the sun is shining from some unseen angle, the day bright but not blinding, with just a hint of rain on the way, and an occasional breeze from afar that smells of the sweet scent of fresh rain over some forest far away? Just like today, now.

Because when it seems so perfect, when the emotions are in perfect balance with one another, when the heart is at peace with the quiet universe itself, we are at a loss as to what we should feel. Thus we dislike it.

Humans are troublesome creatures, no?

Help

Latest update: problem gone away already, inexplicably. Hopefully it doesnt come back inexplicably again. thanks all who helped, and thanks all who missed me. Miss "anonymous" didnt get my thanks then. hahaaa.

I cant login to Windows Live Messenger, windows messenger, or msn web messenger! I keep getting this

error code: 80048820
extended error code: 80048439

Initially when I tried to troubleshoot, it diagnosed my computer as having some problems with the key ports (which I dont know what the heck that is) After 50tries, it no longer diagnose it with that problem anymore. BUT still cant connect! (I think it just got fed up with me so it stopped showing the error)

The thing is, its definitely not my connection problem since I can access web pages like how I am blogging now. It might be my connection settings though, and I have no idea how to fix it. help. I tried system restore to no avail.

Of course, it may be that MSN is simply down. I highly doubt that but I have no way of checking. On random, I decided to sms like 5friends on their msn status: one doesnt use msn, two are not at home, one decided not to login at all, and the last one didnt reply. =_=""

So help. Anyone. Short of suggesting that I reinstall windows or formatting my harddisk, I will readily take your suggestions.

If no one can help me here, then I wouldnt be able to login to msn for quite some time already. For some that may be good news though.

p.s. It would probably not be a good idea to wait for me to login to msn, then tell me your solution.